Awww Skeet Skeet Muthafucka...Part Cinq, and "Dutty Wine in The Park"

Right...So this time it wasn't out on the streets where I found this condom wrapper--It was on my bedroom floor.  Give me second to explain--hold on I need to take a sip of water for this one...(GULP, GULP, GULP...I said GULP).  Better...Ok, See what had happened was I had went to the club on Friday (big up to my boys at LIV, go support).  It was cute, all of the girls decided to come out and twirl.  My dookie Norman, Tamika, Hadi, Carlton (mother), Kenny, Elias, and Ray just to name a few.  For those of you who caught me out the other night, I was wearing some particularly extremely pornographic skinny jeans.  "How'd you get into those", says the trade.  I replied, "Getting into them wasn't the problem, getting out of them will be a task".  "I'm good at taking off pants, my own or anyone else's", he says.  "I'm sure you are, but in the meantime could you buy me a vodka tonic", as I lift my sunglasses to get a better look at him.  Next thing you know, you would think he was Usher and I was that bitch in the video, cause we was makin' some love in the club.  I checked my phone to see what time it was (you have to make sure you leave before the lights come on, or else you look "thirsty").  "I gotta go", I say as I beckon for my friends.  "Is that it, we not gon' chill?"  I told him that if chill meant fuck, that I couldn't see it.  I made that absolutely clear!  Next thing you know he's at my house and he has his finger in my butt.  I said no fucking, I never said he couldn't stick his finger in my ass.  After some pretty hot frottage we fell asleep.  Shortly after, I was awakened by some rustling around.  I thought he was reaching for his cell phone or something?  Nope, this motherfucker was getting a condom out of his wallet, and proceeded to put it on.  Didn't I say I couldn't see that earlier?  Needless to say I sent him home to his wife pitching the biggest tent ever.  Oh, yeah I forgot to tell you that he was married.  I swear to God!  What a waste of a condom.!  Happy Monday, Oh and sorry about the finger in the butt talk.  I'll do better, I know we've talked about this before.    

What a perfect ending to my stressful day at work yesterday.  I joined Howard and friends in Dupont Circle park for wine.  The weather and company was amazing--thanks guys!  Stay tuned for some snapshots that I took, and all who were there know what I'm talking about..