Upset, Confused, and Happy...

Aaliyah - If Your Girl Only Knew (Rare Soul Remix) by wildpitch

UPSET...

Hey guys, I've just been so upset for the last few days. As we all know Sunday was the final episode of Atlanta Housewives Season 3. It was the highest rated season in 'Housewives' history.

I'm sure the high ratings had a little something to do with NeNe and her fights with Dwight, Greg, Kim, Peter, and hell everyone! I think there was even a scene where she fought with Phaedra's baby? The show is definitely a train wreck, but what do I have to live for now?

Then if the season ending of ATL Housewives wasn't enough to send me into convulsions, this is coming out...

A Justin Beiber movie? Who the fuck wants to see a Justin Beiber movie? Oh my God, I can't take it, I swear I'm gonna scream. And then I'm believing it's in 3-D? I seriously am breaking out in hives right now just talking about it. Normally I'm all for teenage girl masturbation material movies, but this one is just vile.

Someone stop me if I'm going too far, but I give Justin Beiber about 5 years before he comes out and goes all "Raz-B" on Usher....lol. That's his pimp! If ANY of you reading this goes to see this movie, there will be hell to pay from me. Hell I say!

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CONFUSED...

I was flipping through the channels the other day and stopped on 'Celebrity Rehab' on Vh-1. Upon watching for a mere 2 minutes, I was so confused. First of all, Is she a celebrity?

Second of all, some people just shouldn't be saved. Frankie was born to be one of those raging alcoholic druggie lunatics. It was her path from birth. Why should we interfere? Sending Frankie to rehab just fucks with the universe. Let her be. She belongs in an alley somewhere free basing, eating fried chicken out of a big cardboard tub, and dancing to old school rap. Anyone who believes otherwise is wrong! Some human beings sole purpose on earth is to be a court jester. She's funny. Probably not as funny sober, so let her be dammit!

Holllllllaaaaaaa!

I was so confused when I heard that Rick Ross and friends apparently spent 1 million dollars at a strip club for his birthday? I'm so glad I stole his cd off Limewire. I couldn't see giving him my 10$. So he could blow it in the club? If he can piss away a mil in the trap, then he is better off than I am.

As a matter of fact, there was one song that I couldn't find on Limewire, and I had to actually pay for from iTunes, where can I write to get that back? I'm so not kidding. Not for anything people, it's Black History Month, could we not act so nigger-like this month at least? OMG...(holds head).

I'm so confused. Don't you have to be divorced before you can get married again? Kelsey Grammer couldn't see waiting! He's apparently getting married on Feb. 25 at the Plaza in NY. His soon to be ex wife "Crazy Camille" is asking for a 50 million dollar settlement, and I believe she deserves every bit of it. As weird as she may be, she stood by his side for 13 years, raised their family, tickled his old wrinkled saggy milky white nut sack when I'm sure she didn't want to, and he up and leaves her without notice? Take him to the cleaners Camille!

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HAPPY...

Rihanna premiered her video for S&M the other day, and I absolutely love it. I'm so happy for her and all of her success. See, there was life after that ass whoopin' Chris Brown put on that ass!

...and I'm out like Mubarak.

Wrap Up, Get 'Em Frankie, and NO HOMO...

Whew! I must be getting old, because I feel like Rodney King after the beating in '91. My ass is tired, and I have to go to...I can't even say it! You guys know, it's that word that starts with "w". Most people go everyday for about 8 hours. Ugggghhhh!

Enough sad talk, my week was super busy starting with the 'Capitalism: A Love Story' DC movie premiere on Tuesday (thanks Eve). The movie was amazing. It really brought many issue to the forefront. Michael Moore always does a great job of blowing up spots, and he definitely did in this film.

After the movie, there was a question and answer period with Mr. Moore (Michael Moore, not Shemar) himself. He only got to take 3 questions from the audience, because he had to do an interview with that queen Anderson Cooper.

After the movie, J and I hit it to The Donovan House rooftop for a night cap. It is always so nice up there. On Tuesday it was a little chilly, but you guys should know that I dress in layers year round, so I was aiiiight. Word at the party was that Lady Gaga was going to stop there after her performance at Constitution Hall. I told friends that if Lady Gaga walked in, I would jump off the rooftop of the Donovan. I would get so much life that I would want to die. How over is that?

On to the next one...

The next night was my brother Kenny's birthday. You know we had to come out for that. We (the rest of the table, excluding me) had a lovely dinner at Hudson on M St. Everyone looked so nice...well, mostly everyone looked so nice (side eye). I'm sorry brother Kenny, he may be your friend but you are not allowed to throw shade at me or my friends if you're wearing a square toed shoe and pleated dress pants. I'm just so sorry about that, but you're not. Fucking haters dude! Anywho...

It's always the white fag who has to act a fool!

Jonathan, Normie, and Joey walking to the car after dinner. We headed to Modern to get our two step on. It was cute there. I'm guessing it's a new party going on, I'd go back. It was cute for a Wednesday.

On to the next one...

Saturday night was my co worker Jill's birthday party. She held the party at her neighbors house. It was a karaoke party. If you missed my status message on Facebook on Saturday night, it read 'White people like karaoke'. Sans rhythm they sang the night away off the rum punch. It was a great time. I asked if they had any Lil Kim, but I only got a confused face, "No, no we don't" response.

On to the next one...

Yesterday was paintball day, that's why I feel like I went 3 rounds with Pacquiao. It was in Bumblefuck, Va. J and I woke up around 7:30, and we were still late. We got there right on time, because everyone else was late too. I had a blast. I was fucking people up left and right. I got to take some (all) of my frustrations out. I felt like a kid again, a very old kid who got tired after only an hour of paintball, but still a kid nonetheless.

On to the next one...

After the trek from Bumblefuck, Va into the city, I had to meet up with friends for a late late business brunch...

We did Tabaq on U street. The view from there is amazing. We had a great brunch, and discussed our upcoming venture (stay tuned for details).

At yesterdays brunch: Horace thought he was some Columbian drug lord or some shit. SMH...

After brunch, we headed to 'The Coolout" on The Beacon Hotel rooftop. Good music, good weather, good food, good drinks, good friends. After The Beacon, I bowed out. There was another party at Marvin. I couldn't do it. I would have been more tired than this. After a long shower, and a little 'Khloe and Kourtney Take Miami', it was bed time. Now i'm blogging, and I'm totally late for wo...I swear I can't bring myself to say it. Fuck!

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Frankie you better get it! It seems that Frankie "Code 10 Man Down" Cole has a new boyfriend. How about his ass is 21, and very cute if I may add (No Homo). I thought I was a cougar, but damn. It seems that Frankie has that "good good". Maybe that crack she did in the 80's and 90's preserved her vagina? I don't know, I'm just sayin'...

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You guys hear about Ms. Tyson Beckford saying that IF he had to be with a man, it would be Obama. He then took it even further to say that he would top him (crickets). I don't know ANY totally straight man that would admit to this tom fuckery, and on national television no doubt. That's just disgusting! I'm mean I'd watch and all(No HOMO), but it's still disgusting...kinda.

Happy Monday...

"Man Down...", and My New Man

So, "Man down" aka Frankie Cole is making magazine covers now.  I wouldn't be surprised if we saw Frankie with her own show, because that bitch is funny as shit.  I take my lace front off to her for being a recovered drug and alcohol addict, and also for giving us some over tag lines.  Work Frankie!

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Ok,you can stop looking now.  That's Al Horford, my new husband.  Horford plays for the Atlanta Hawks, and can be seen in Ciara's new video "Never Ever".  His 6' 10" fine Dominican ass gives me what I need, and I would never have to blame it on the alcohol.  That's some shit you'd wanna fess up to.  Get in...

Is that how big it is?  I'm scared, yet slightly intrigued...

Don't he look just as precious, like he just got back from Easter dinner at his grannie's house?  Ok, stop looking...

Random Fashion Thoughts, Oooh Obama, and Frankie, Frankie, Frankie...

Why is Naomi the most over supermodel cunt that has ever graced the runway?  Dolce and Gabanna couldn't see not having her be the ONLY female to walk in their Men's Spring/Summer '09 fashion show.  Of course she slayed the walk, and made the people gag.  Why in the hell would Yves Saint Laurent replace her as the face of YSL with Claudia Schiffer.  I couldn't see it myself...

How hot is this look from Alexander McQueen's Spring/Summer '09 show?  It gives the illusion of a one-piece.  There were all types of hot things from McQueen for Spring.  Being that there were no offers for anyone to buy me those boots from the last post...the above pant and shirt will do.

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Why is our President elect Barrack Obama so fine?  Look at him, he's just as cute as he wanna be.  Watch him Michelle.  Make sure none of that Bill Clinton shit goes on in the Oval Office.  Michelle would whip some ass, Do u hear me?  I'm talking about a good 'ol natural ass whippin' down to the white meat.  I don't want none...

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Wow, did anyone see the premiere of Keisha Cole's BET reality show?  That's Frankie Cole, Keisha's real mother (said with hardly parting my lips).

Frankie is Keisha's biological mother who gave Keisha up as a young child due to her drug and alcohol addictions.  The show follows Keisha's family every yell and scream of the way.  There are specific tongues of Ebonics that I've never even heard being used on this freakin show'.  I find myself embarrassed at times wondering whether anyone other than the Black race somehow stumbled upon this buffoonery.  I mean come on, Obama was just elected into office, we were on a high--and now this? 

Quotes from the show...

Frankie Cole:  "I don't want to go to dinner wit' you.  Imma be watchin horror movies and eatin Popeye's chicken all day..."

Frankie Cole:  "I'm her real momma.  I carried her for 9 months!"

Frankie Cole:  "Y'all always be treatin' me like a crackhead!"

Frankie Cole:  " I don't need her help.  I need you, I need Neffie, I need Sam, I need Ellie, I need Robert, I need Lativia, I need Alice, and I need you to not hug me right now!"

She's supposed to be clean from drugs now, so that means she's still trippin' off shit she took back in the 80's and 90's?  Son, that's some powerful shit, and I don't want any!  Crackheads are the fucking ruler, especially crackheads with a millionaire daughter who has a reality show.  Somebody get me an aspirin.