Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Number One "Around The Way Girl" Of All Time: Sheneneh Jenkins...

 I will definitely spring to say that Sheneneh Jenkins is THE number one "Around The Way Girl" of all time.  The weave, the nails, the fork tongue all add to her ghetto mystique.  It's been well over 10 years since the last episode of 'Martin' has aired, but thank God for my personal 'Martin' dvd collection and sites like AOL video and YouTube who keep her spirit alive today. As uppity as we all may try to act sometime, we definitely either have a friend or cousin that conjures the T of Sheneneh, so don't even front!  I even at times find myself channeling her, and have to bring myself back to earth.  There is no denying that Sheneneh is the mother-fucking ruler.  Get into many of her famous quotes (below), and watch a couple of her clips from the show (above).  It's officially "Sheneneh Jenkins Day", so go tell off your boss or something...

Sheneneh Jenkins:
Age: 26
Occupation: Weave Technician
Status: Single and loves to mingle

Sheneneh says, she's very much a lady, and likes a
Brother that's down. If he disrespects her though,
she'll beat him like he stole something.

Tichina Arnold

With a Disrespectful Date (Chris Rock)

I told you you could super-size it! I told you!... I'm a lady, and you don't disrespect no lady! You better watch your back!

Sheneneh, I can't buy nothin' with five dollars! You can buy a one-way ticket to get the hell outta' my face!

With a Casting Director

I guess no other Ladies showed up. Oh they showed up, but they was toe up, from the flo' up, almost made me throw up!

Sheneneh, what's your secret? I like to stay cute in the face, and thin in the waist

Have you studied martial arts? I don't know Karate, but I damn sure know crazy!

After getting the part -- Oh my goodness!, oh my goodness!, I've got to call Loquita!


With a White Girl

Do you work here? "Do I look like I work here?" No!, but you look like you' 'bout to get yo' ass kicked!

Gina's Wedding Emergency

It's Gina's Wedding day and she's messed up her hair. Every place in town is closed. Gina and Pam turn to Sheneneh. She agrees to help, but she gives Pam an attitude. Pam: "Look Sheneneh, just do Gina's hair, and do my nails, and don't mess up!"Don't be threatenin' me! 'Cause can't nobody mess you up! 'Cause mother nature already done did that!

Wait a minute! Don't you think you're over stepping your bounds? Don't get dropped! You'll be at your wedding with noneof these, None of these! [teeth]

Sheneneh Jenkins vs. Tommy Strong

Sheneneh drives a '78 Mercedes. Tommy accidently dents Sheneneh's fender. She's furious!Sorry didn't do it Tommy! You're the one who put a dent in my Benz-o, with your 18 inch Lorenzos!

Sheneneh decides to take legal action. She's sueing Tommy for 1.7 million. She hires a Dream Team to prosecute. Sheneneh shows up in court with crutches and a neck brace.

He didn't have to hit me! He used that vehicle as a weapon! And you don't do that!

Pam is called to testify. A vicious argument erupts between her and Sheneneh. Judge: Order! Order! Order in this court!

Oh, I don't even know why I let her work on my nerves, 'cause she aint even on my level! OK? Pam: "I can't stoop that low!" You aint gonna have to stoop that low, 'cause you gonna have to get up, 'cause I'm 'bout to straighten out your crooked teeth! Now get up! Sheneneh lunges at Pam.

Finally, Sheneneh takes the stand. The fact is... the fact is! Tommy hit me! And I'm just lucky to be here to be alive to tell my story! (Heavy sobbing and sniveling)

Tommy, acting as his own defense, approaches the stand. He grills Sheneneh for a couple minutes, then shouts "Now you tell these people the truth! Tell The Truth!!"

Oh my God! Look at him! I need the witness protection program!

Sheneneh Jumps up, throws her crutches into the aisle, and bolts out of the courtroom with lightning speed.

The next day the Judge announces "The court rules for the plaintiff, Miss Sheneneh Jenkins." Oh my goodness! Oh my gooness! We Won! The court orders Tommy Strong to pay 170 Dollars. In Sidebar: But your Honor! What about my bodily injuries? Judge: "M'am, yesterday you sailed out of here like Gail Devers!"

Sheneneh ends up having to pay off her Dream Team.

The Women's League

Sheneneh and her friend Loquita crash an upper-class, mostly White, women's league meeting. Sheneneh shoves the speaker off the podium, then gives a speech on how all the hair styles and nails in the room need help. After about five minutes, a lady takes back the podium, gently nudging Sheneneh away. "Thank you, we've heard enough Miss Jenkins."

Oh, OK, well don't push OK? You might not wanna push. I can set it off up in here, alright? Pow!

Don't front and lose a tooth up in here while you tryin' to front in fronta' all ya' friends! Pow!

Sheneneh and Loquita, to Pam and Gina's dismay, are gracefully accepted into the League after doing the ladies' hair and nails for free.

In The Hall With Gina & Pam

ShenenehGina & Pam are at the door with boxes.

Huh!, it looks like Martin finally done kicked you to the curb Gina!

"I am not movin' out, I'm movin' in!"

What? You don't have my permission to move in here!

Pam: "Permission? Please girl, we aint gotta' explain nothin' to you!"

I was not even talkin' to you Cujo! I'm gonna' call Keylolo, and when she gets a hold of this mess, somebody's gonna' get hurt! I happen to be the 3rd floor Captain in this building!
Sheneneh"3rd floor Captain? What's that mean?"

That means, number one, no loud music after ten, unless it's Jodeci or Patti Labelle. Number two, no arguing, fussin' or fightin' unless it's Martin kickin' and scratchin' and beatin' and throwin' yo' ass down! -- You aint heard the last of me!Sheneneh turns and storms back into her apartment, slamming the door behind her.

In The Hall With Tommy and Cole

ShenenehTommy and Cole are at Martin's door. Tommy drops his b'ball. It rolls into Sheneneh's door.Sheneneh emerges with the ball: What's up! Cole: What's up Sheneneh? Hey Cole, how you doin'? Tommy: Cole! Don't get her started. Now Tommy? I know you aint trippin' with your little bald headed self. It takes more than a bald head to be like Michael Jordan anyway! Tommy: Sheneneh? Now look, I don't want any trouble. All I want is for you to give me the ball (Tommy grabs for it). No Tommy. Gimme the ball! No Tommy! Sheneneh! Give me the ball!No Tommy!! Tommy: Oh Sheneneh... sweetheart.. I am trying awfully hard to be patient with your little tired ass! Now give me the ball! (Tommy lunges for it). Tired? Since I'm so tired, take the ball Tommy! Tommy: What! Since I'm so tired, then take the ball from me Tommy!Tommy: What are you talkin' about! (Sheneneh starts to dance and dribble the ball, butting her rear up against Tommy) ShenenehI'll show you what I'm talkin' about! (Sheneneh dances around Tommy) Take the ball from me! Cole: Tommy, take the ball! Tommy: I'll take it! I'll take it! (Tommy makes his best effort, but Sheneneh eludes him) I'll take it! Take it! Come on! I'll show you what a girl can do! Look at me ride Tommy! Look at you Tommy! Who said Black girls can't jump! Tommy stops, panting: I could get that ball anytime I want! Well I was goin' to work out anyway. Why don't we take this down to the courts? So Sheneneh, Tommy, and Cole head down to the basketball courts to settle the incident.

The Very First Episode

Gina & Pam are at Martin's door. Sheneneh steps out into the hall.

Well, well... look at the little business girls. I heard Martin insulting women on the radio today. I know you're goin' in there to dump him. So why don't you just send him over to my crib? Cause I know how to tame that man, alright?Pam: Girl, mind your ugly business and get back in your apartment! Let me tell you somethin' alright? You do not know me! OK? You do not know me, I will bust your ass, OK? Pam: Will let the bustin' begin! Pam takes off her shoe for a weapon. Gina restrains her. Sheneneh starts to dance and box at the air. Let her go! Let her go!! Gina: Sheneneh? You better go back in your apartment. Pam? Put your shoe back on! She is not worth it! Not worth it huh? Girl, you aint heard the last of me. I could bust you in your ear right now! Pam:That did it! Pam lunges toward Sheneneh. Sheneneh retreats into her apartment and slams the door.

Some Random Quotes

Keylolo? Yo' momma musta' been Trippin' when she gave you that name!

"Sheneneh!, what's wrong?" Don't try to act like you care about me, 'cause I damn sure don't care about y'all!

Well looky, looky! if it aint Stanky and the Little Rascal!

Let me tell you somethin' you little low budget Salt n Peppa!

quote credits: google


Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

flip wislon would say geraldine LOL

Promiscuous X said...

Im craking up at work off this