Rachel Ray vs. LisaRaye: Oh no...

Rachel Ray was born on August 25, 1968 in Upstate New York.  Ray has been nominated for two daytime Emmys.  She has her own talk show, and also host two cooking shows, her famous '30 minute meals', and 'Rachel Ray's Tasty Travels'.  In 2006, the bitch even launched her own magazine.  If she doesn't have enough money yet, her endorsements include Burger King, Nabisco crackers, and Dunkin Donuts.  

Lisa Raye was born on September 23, 1967.  She made some movies and things, and tried to be on sitcoms or something...(crickets).  Oh, she had a really big wedding in Caicos, (more crickets), but that man left her for some cunt from BET.

In 2007, Rachel Ray announced that the famous Madame Tussaud museum was creating a wax figure of her likeness.

(crickets fading...)  Lisa Raye is Da Brat's half sister.  Oh, she was also in 'The Players Club'.  "Ebony, girl don't get in that car.  They gon' run a train on you..." (crickets fading even more)

Rachel Ray is endorsed by (I'm about to say it, don't look...) Oprah, and in 2006 earned over 6 million dollars that year alone.  

Ummm, Lisa Raye was in that Sisqo video 'Incomplete' (tumbleweeds going by, and crickets).  Oh, I know.  She was nominated for a NAACP Image Award (street light goes off, everyone scatters).  

Sorry Lisa girl, Rachel has that "O" lady on her side.  People have disappeared off the face of this earth when they've fucked with Oprah.  

**True Story**

The son of a famous maker of exotic handbags gave me the scoop on Ms. O. Last Christmas season her people called to order 500 crocodile clutches as gifts.  They were ecstatic to fill such an order and gave Harpo wholesale price.  When the bill arrived to the studio, Oprah herself called the showroom and asked why the bill was so low.  She said that they were supposed to be $1,100 a piece.  When she found out she was given wholesale price, she was outraged.  She demanded to pay full price and told them to never give her a discount again when she ordered.  Is that fierce or what?  Now who wanna fuck with her?  Anyone...

Lisa Raye, you betta run girl...