Monday, May 11, 2009

Weekend wrap-Up,The Return of Awww Skeet Skeet, Oooooh Rih-Rih, and King Oprah...

Hello all, I', hoping that everyone had a safe and most glorious weekend.  It was absolutely gorgeous here yesterday, but I felt like crap.  My allergies twirled my ass like shit.  I could hardly breathe.  
Anyways, Saturday night was the only night I went out this weekend.  Remember that I'm putting myself on the "B" word?  Myself, Leata, Yaneek, and sister Joey all went to show Mr. Billy Bradshaw some love at Policy.  It was his birthday.  Horace, from the looks of things, I'm not even sure if you remember that I was there?  It's ok though, it was your birthday.  Horace wasn't the only birthday at Policy on Saturday.  It was some queen's birthday there, that brought the boys to the yard.  I saw a couple of ex-conjures and things.  Yaneek, why couldn't I see talking to that cute boy in the stripe shirt again?  You have to stop me next time and have me focus.  Now, in my sober state, from what I remember he was kinda cute.  I don't need to pass up any potential husband's these days, I'm not getting any younger.  My toes are right in the fucking edge of 31, FUCK!  
So after Policy, we wanted to keep the party going.  The four of us decided to head over to FLY lounge.  Despite the busy Dupont Circle location, we parked with ease and began to walk up to the door.  We walked up on this...   

The picture is kinda dark, but you can kinda make it out.  Some trade had passed out from drinking too much.  He was a little cutie too, despite his bad square toed shoe.  My theory is that he had stopped to pee on the street (his fly was open), and he passed out.  He was sleeping like he was on a mother fuckin' Beauty Rest or Serta commercial.  Some bad person stole his cell phone (the clip was empty), and even took off with his wallet.  We called 911, and tried to wake him up as much as possible.  Our asses went into the club, got it in, and came out an hour and a half later, and he was still there.  This time there were 3 beat ass trade there trying to help him out.  We left feeling better about the situation, and headed over to Layla for the let-out.  Yaneek walked on her "Honey" looking extra delicious in those damn near 6 inch Louboutin's.  While we were outside of the club I saw this mami with the beat ass shape.  Joey and I immediately started to show her grace, and she got life from "the girls".  Girl, you got a body like a Maserati, I loved those Gucci mules Eva, we must hang soon.  
After Layla we went to LOVE to see Yaneek's cousin who works the door there.  They had a ghetto ass concession stand outside that sold chicken tenders and french fries.  Those goddamn 10 dollar chicken fingers were beat as hell.  You know you'll eat anything when you're drunk at 4 in the morning, but I swear I felt like I was at Ruth's Chris.  
After that conjure, we took it in.  I woke up yesterday with the worst allergy symptoms ever.  I called out of work, and layed it back down. 
Around 2:30 I woke up and decided to go see my Mama for mother's day.  My brother came to pick me up, and we started the long journey to Stafford.  

This is what I got Mama.  Marc Jacobs is one of her favorites for an "everyday" bag.  She says, "I don't like to carry my Chanel bags during the week, they are for Sundays!"  Work!  
We had a seafood feast at my parents house.  It was amazing.  Crabs, lobster tails, shrimp, fish, scallops, chicken breast, ribs, pulled pork, and a host of sides topped the menu.  I'm definitely eating the leftovers for lunch today.  
I was also happy to finally meet my new Great Nephew Aaden.

He is 3 weeks old.  I can't believe that my nephew has a baby?  Ummm, ummm, ummm...  I just don't wanna think that my neices and nephews are fucking, but I guess they are?  Dammit!  Anyways Aaden and I had some Great Uncle/Great Nephew time.  I dressed him up in his baby drag.  I changed his outfit 3 times, I'm talking shoes and all.  He loved it!  
I got back home prety lte last night.  I was zonked from the day.  I took a shower and hit the sack.  Hope your Monday isn't sucking?  Peace...

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I'm guessing since the weather is breaking, there will be more and more nasty mother fuckers fucking outside.  Remember last summer how I couldn't walk around the city without nearly stepping on a condom?  Now it's just gone too far.  Not only are they fucking outside, but they are also doing this outside as well...

For real? Is this what it's come too?  The bad thing about it is that this wasn't even in the city, this was found in a residential area near Tysons II Galleria Mall.  The pissy cup and all just left on the side of the street.  I have a clue as to just how "k"lassy  the chick is who did this.  Nasty bitch!  I'm hoping tht she did't end up pregnant, if she did I'm putting the Child Services number on speed dial so they can come take that poor little child from her.  Ewwwww...

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I'm sure by now yo guys have seen the alleged nude Rihanna pictures.  That is someone who looks very much to be Ms. brown with a pink thong on his head.  The other pics, which are not safe for work are all over the net, so get your goo
gle on when you get home. 

I'm sure it is Rihanna, she looks like a nasty freaky ass dick taking cunt.  That's why I live for her, she doesn't give a fuck...

Get into her shape.....Oooowwwww...

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This photo was taken at a recent event.  Can you guys get into Oprah's carter?  She has a look on her grill that gives, "Get this crazy bitch away from me...!"  Her teeth are clinched for filth.  I wouldn't be surprised if M.I.A. turned up M.I.A.  Oprah has made many people disappear off the face of this earth, never to be seen or heard from again.  Phil Donahue?  

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

You always make me die several times. The Oprah comment, priceless, because it really looks as if that is what she is thinking to herself.

.....................................

She says, "I don't like to carry my Chanel bags during the week, they are for Sundays!"

She better eat it, work.

Cup-o-Noodles said...

roflol... incredible, as always.

Langston Baldwin said...

Your BLOG... to quote you "I LIVE!"
You are like my 2nd brain - tooooo
humourous for words. You need your own magazine.

TheBlogArtistFormerlyKnownAsYBandDL said...

Okay first of all, I thought you were saving money, Mr. Q, I don't know about the exact retail on Women's fashion like that, but that Marc Jacobs, had to set you back a few, I'm sure, but hey she gay you life, so do you!

You know I'm mad that yall just left him out there when you couldn't get that nigga off the ground and went in the club anyway...I can see y'all now, well we tried, lets go get our drink on!
Now you said his fly was open, did you steal a peek, I'm everything else on the guy was stolen, why not steal a peak of the the one eyed monster...Okay am I nasty for saying I would have?

Babyboy, I hope you have some much older siblings, if you are 30 and having great nephews already?
And you got some swirl going on in the family.

Q, you know you have had a time, where you got busy outside. When it was to hot to wait till you got outside. Well I know I have a few condom wrappers left around the city of my own, there I said. I know tacky, but hell you do what you have to do at times!!!

NowI will say that taking the pregnacy test outside was truly ....wrong plain wrong...ewwww! I'm sure there was some where classier to do that, like in a gas station bathroom.

I am going to leave that RiRi thing unsaid here!

I have one question, what event is it that Oprah and M.I.A. are at together?
Oprah does have that "Security!!!!" look on here face. Ohh I know how she feels. I have had that smile on my face once or twice in my life!

Q said...

YB and DL, okay I have had sex outside. Shoot me!

Chaz: Doesn't it? She did say it i'm sure.

Dusty: Thank you boo...

Langston: I do need my own magazine! You would be a contributor of course. You give me life as well.

fuzzy said...

So much... the cup... no. Rihanna freak... yes... Me living for this post... Yes!!! So sad what happened to the cutie square-toe shoe wearing drunk... thats unfortunate!

Cup-o-Noodles said...

Q: Go read my blog and then email me. Or you're not gonna get anything....! :)

Blogger T said...

Hilarious..... I would have felt the drunk trade up before the club. YESSSS!!!.... Your little great nephew is so cute. Don't feel bad about your age. I got a first cousin who was born the year I graduated high school. That little thing is up to my chest now, Wow..... Oprah rules!!! Smoochies!!

deonte' k said...

LOL... that condom thing is nasty... aww the babe is soo cute.... I gotta see these Rihanna an Cassie Pics floating around... nice bag!!! ;)