Monday, April 20, 2009

Weekend Wrap-Up, B and Kanyizzle, and But He Said He'd Pull Out!

Good Monday morning!  This picture has shit to do with anything, I just love it.  Leave it up to Phelps and his followers to spread the word of hate, and to dress innocent kids in t-shirts that say "God Hates Fags. Com" (blank stare *tapping pen on table*)  Anyways, once again my weekend started on Thursday at Lauriol Plaza.  It has started to become a weekly family gathering.  This Thursday coming up is Betsey's birthday at Shadow Room, so we may have to skip this week.  I'm sure all of the alcohol that was consumed by us this weekend there will still be in our system by the time we go back.  On Thursday it was a rack of us.  We had to push three tables together.  It was giving the last supper, only if Jesus served chips, salsa, and margaritas?  I'm quite sure they put something in those things.  I have never craved anything like that before (I'm lying).  Besides, they always get you right where you need to be.  That point where you're tipsy, but when you close your eyes you're not spinning yet.  Or it will get you here...   

Pissing on the streets of DC.  Sorry brother, I had to do it.   So after Lauriol, we all decided to go to Bebar.  It's my sister Joey's party there.  I'm so glad that the party is catching on, it's quite cute now.  We always say that we will only stay for 20 minutes.  Next thing you know you're dancing like an 'America's Best Dance Crew' reject, watching strippers, and doing shots of Patron.  Speaking of strippers, get into Anaconda... 

Just by show of hands, could anyone tell me why they call him that?  Ummm, yeah!  Damn...(fanning myself with a church fan).  Anyways, after BeBar we decided to go grab a bite to eat in Adam's Morgan.  At 3 in the morning when you're tipsy someone could deep fry shit and it would taste so good.  Basically, that's what we ate.  We got big jumbo pizza slices.  It was so greasy, my stomach still hurts.  At the moment though, nobody couldn't have told me that it wasn't a petit filet from Ruth's Chris.  

Friday morning i was due to work at 9.  I arrived at 11 looking like I had been a victim of police brutality.  It was not a good look.  Friday night I came home and crashed!  Saturday I woke up feeling refreshed.  I worked until 7, and was excited to see my friend Naleli for her birthday gathering.  I headed over to Adam's Morgan, and had the best time.  Happy birthday Pony friend.

I was leaving to go home to get some rest, (my allergies were kicking my ass) when "the fag" aka Jonathan sent a text: "The girls are at Lauriol, where are you?  One swirl I tell myself, and then I will go home.  I can do that right?

WRONG!  This is Nikki at around 3:30 a.m.  Get into her doing her "Candy Girls" pose.  After a brief stop at Indulg, and finishing off at PURE, the night was a conjure!  Nikki had on the most over Guissepe's of all, while Abena donned an over poufy skirt with a side ponytail.

Oh no!  I live!  You just can't win when everyone in the group is a conjure.  Happy Monday!

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That cunt Beyonce has released her US tour dates.  She will open at Madison Square Garden on June 21st, and will be here in chocolate city on June 24th.  Tickets go on sale today for Beyonce fan club members.  Thank you Christon for staying on top of that.  I will have my face in the place.  Thierry Mugler turned the costuming.  Who has Thierry Mugler do their costumes for their tour?  Beyonce is such a faggy, I get life...  What I don't think I'll get life from is 'Obsessed'.  The movie will be in theaters this weekend.  From what I see in the previews Beyonce's acting is horrible.  I know one thing, for 10$ they better should Idris Elba's ass or something.  That will balance out Beyonce's lack of acting ability.  She is determined to get this acting thing down.  She'll get it someday (crickets).

Get into Ms. Kanye's new pictures for her LV tennis shoe line.  She "hired" her new boyfriend Amber Rose to pose with her.  Why is Kanye smiling with her eyes.  That queen is the ruler!

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Remember this?  It was my first blog post.  I've been blogging for a year now, wish me a Happy Anniversary...NOW!


Ladies and queens, don't fall for it!  First, they say they just wanna come up and talk.  Once you let them in, next thing you know you're making out.  You say to yourself, "I'm not gonna do this again..."  Damn he got you!  Then he whispers in your ear, "Can I  just put the head in?"  No mother fucker in the HISTORY of mother fuckers has ever kept true to that promise.  You either run for the door, or lay there. If  you lay there, it's a wrap!  Next thing you know you're calling on God, and your ass ain't been to church in years.  All you wanted was the never ending salad and breadsticks at Olive Garden, and this nigga done bussed nuts all up in your ass.  Nine months later you're at the ghetto Giant Food on O Street swiping a food stamp card.  

It's ugly isn't it...?  You think he regrets lying about pulling out?  No!  He did that same bull shit to two of your homegirls.  Fuck, does anybody have the number to Maury Povich?

16 comments:

borzou said...

Its not so much that we're lying, but sometimes it surprises us too! You think we didn't want to pull out?! Okay, sometimes it on purpose, but for the most part, its poor timing. That is why I'm a big fan of birth control. From a magnum, to a brick to the stomach, somethings gotta work!

Q said...

This is why you're my brother...

borzou said...

The fact that you appreciated that is why you're my sister..

Viva said...

Something has to be seriously wrong with you! All these years I have known you I couldn't quite put my finger on it... I still cant... But something is wrong. Maybe once I figure it out I wont love you quite as much!

I love you and miss you. Call me.

-V-

JEW said...

WHO TAUGHT ANOTHER BLACK TO TYPE?? THIS IS INSANE!! not another black blog!

Q said...

that's so over...

Dusty Boot said...

happy blogging anniversary!

That Kanye picture is spooky.

Sapphire Blu said...

in the mix of a borderline tsunami and a checkcard left at home with no cash in sight: this made my day ;o)

love the pic of kanye and her boyfriend!

happy blogiversay!!!

Chaz said...

Miss Abena really wasn't playing with the girls this past weekend. Her ponytail was snatched I see. LOL. Go off, Abena.

KI@ Amber Rose being Kanye's boyfriend. I can't.

Keisha said...

Hold the mutherf*cking phone! Quincy-Boo, you're too much. But why has that happened to me before - only difference, I wrapped that joker up!!!!! AAAAAAALLLL my kids got the same baby daddy.

deonte' k said...

Can't wait to see Obsessed!!!

Promiscuous X said...

Not a brick to the stomach...Oh shit lmao

Sidenote: yo Q im going to be in DC memorial day weekend. I wanna party with you and yo peoples. The spots you be showcasing seem hot.

Troy N. said...

anaconda schamonda somebody hold the mustard. This reminds me of a episode of Get Christie Love but we won't go there.

M.D. Rice said...

That was truly informative and hilarious. You are talented!!!!

Jamar Herrod said...

LMFAOOOO I LIVE FOR THE DUDE PISSING, ANACONDA, NIKKI'S PIC, KANYE'S BOYFRIEND, THE TWO CUTIES ESPECIALLY THE ONE WITH THE BLUE AND THE COMMENTARY AT THE END..LMFAO@SWIPING A FOOD STAMP CARD. WHEWWWW YES! YESSS!

Dm said...

Yooooo....Abena is smokin!


Dm