Monday, March 29, 2010

And My Weekend Went A Lil' Somethin' Like This..., Boss Lady, Caught By Q, and 'Window Seat'

(singing loudly) "Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
Keep On With The Force Don't Stop
Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough..."

It's Michael Jackson Monday for me today. I needed a little pick me up, so I turned my Ipod on and danced around to 'Don't Stop Til You Get Enough'. I'm so not kidding. Im sure my neighbors think I'm crazy, but who cares. If the sex noises haven't run them away, then I'm sure they're fine with a little Michael in the morning.
I was dancing around and singing like an 'American Idol' reject, you should try it. It got my blood pumping, and now I'm ready to blog bitches. So listen!

It seems like this week has been non-stop. On Monday night I met up with "The Crew" at Gordon Biersch for late night happy hour. Lord knows I needed a drink (side eye). After I inhaled a plate of wings and a couple of cocktails, we headed over to Marvin's on 14th St. The vibe is always great there, it's just always too packed for me. I can't see people ever stepping on my shoes. Last Monday was different. It was crowded, but I didn't feel like a slave on a slave ship--I had room to move around. The music is ALWAYS dope. Add the greatest hits from the 80's and 90's and you'll get Monday night at Marvin.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to turn you

After Marvin's we jetted over to Fly. I was a little apprehensive at first because there are too many Blacks there on Monday, but I remembered that I brought my mace out so it was fine (sigh). We were only there for a little bit. After a drink, my ace Ky'Leigh and I decided to have a mirror photoshoot. People were looking, but I could care less. Get into Ky'Leigh's new hair do. I love the ponytail, and all of the guys were feeling it at FLY too. She said yesterday that she was going to start a Facebook Fan page for her ponytail. Please get on that Ky, I'm the first to "Become a Fan"!

While we were photoshooting it up, My boy Mike was getting hemmed up by these bitches who were all over his testicles. The face says it all. Luckily, we distracted her with a chicken wing so that Mike could escape. No one was harmed.

On Wednesday I worked. I had to escape a tad early to meet up with the rest of my cast members from 'The Real Housecunts of DC' (minus Jonathan, he was getting spray tanned). We were having dinner at Pasta Mia in Adam's Morgan.

I had never been there before. I swear I thought people were lying when they said you had to line up an hour before the restaurant opened--they weren't. Obviously, there's only 1 chef and however you line up is the order you are served. The doors open at 6:30, but if you're in the back of the line, you may not get served until 8/8:30.
The shit was good. I had ravioli stuffed with crabmeat and shrimp. The pasta nazi's only take cash, so I had to make a quick run to the ATM. I found out days later that I left my fucking card stuck in there. After I had committed "Carbocide", I went home to sleep it off. I definitely had "the itis" after that meal.

On Thursday I woke up still feeling full from last night's meal. I ran a couple of errands, and prepared myself to head to the Alexander McQueen event at The W. The event was thrown by the Washington Design Center and featured McQueen garb from Hu's Wear in Georgetown (Hi Dwayne). It was a blast.

Here is Aureta at the event. She always looks amazing.

You guys already saw my outfit from Thursday, but I figured I'd show you again.

Oh, there's free tampons in the women's bathroom at The W if anyone was wondering...

After the W, "The Crew" headed over to Morton's in Georgetown. Thank God we got inside before it started raining, or else my spray tan on my legs would have streaked! After I stuffed myself, we decided to head to Shadowroom on K St. Big fucking mistake!
How dare ANY wack ass bouncer in pleated dress slacks look me up and down and question what I wear! Go get a clue and come back again. Thanks Taya for giving them shit. Oh, and no thanks, I'll pass on your invitation to come back.
SHADOWROOM THURSDAYS SUCK! Oh, and there were girls there in "going out" tops from RAVE. Just another reason to steer clear!

After that, I skipped ship over to my sister Joey's party at EFN lounge. It was fun. I got one last cocktail, and watched this queen "lip synch for his life". Check out the video below.

You can see him getting his dance on until around :14 seconds in the vid when a lunar eclipse moves in, I mean his friend walks onto the dance floor.

Friday night was the Gentleman Jack event at an auditorium on Constitution Ave.

I went with my brother Borzou (isn't he handsome),

and my brother Robert. Get into his "90210" hair. It's pretty damn great, isn't it?

The party featured Urban/Hip Hop artist from all over the country. Oh, and free Gentleman's Jack all night? Jigga what?

(singing "You remind me of a girl that I once knew...")

They had bikes that you could pose on and take pictures in front of a graffiti back drop. I have no clue who the cunt I'm on the bike with. They told me to join their picture, so I did...

After a quick outfit change, my boo picked me up to headed to a friend's birthday party. The party was at Sutra in Adam's Morgan. I made sure I had all proper and necessary shots before heading to that part of town on a weekend night!

The party was cute.

After the party, we went to Manny and Olga's for late night pizza. I believe I swallowed the whole slice whole. I was starving. After my pizza night cap, I turned in. I had to be up in a couple hours for work.

After my dreadful day picking cotton at work, I headed to Dupont for a bite to eat. I wanted to try BGR, the new burger joint on Connecticut Ave.

Yummmm is all I can say. I destroyed that burger in less than 5 minutes, and then walked over to Krispy Kreme ( I needed some doughnuts to wash the burger down with).
After I binged (no purge necessary), I took a nap. I woke up and met my Housecunts over at SEI for a cocktail. I convinced them to go with me to meet up with my friend from college who was in town. He wanted to go here...

Before we knew it, dicks were swinging about our heads like ceiling fans. Secrets is the greatest place on earth. Everyone walks around with a semi erection (the patrons, not the dancers). Housecunt Nikki found one dancer in particular that she is fond of. We had to put smelling salts under her nose to bring her to--she was in a daze! The 'Housecunts of DC' Jersey Shore "fist pumped", danced, and laughed until it was time to go. It's always a great time there.

Yesterday it was the "Sunday School" party at Little Miss Whiskey's thrown by the one and only Kristy Love. It's an early party from 3-9, with barbeque, and some of the best drinks around! I'll def be back. The energy was great, and the music rocked my world!

That's me in the bathroom having a photo shoot. People were knocking on the door, but I was busy. When I opened the door, there was a guy holding his crotch about to pee on himself. His incontinence is not a concern of mine!

After Miss Whiskey's, we headed over to Marvin. Last night they were having a slide show exhibit. The exhibit featured images from photojournalist who traveled to Haiti after the earthquake. Needless to say, it was a downer. We were there for about 20 minutes before I couldn't take anymore. It makes you appreciate your "sucky" life. You instantly realize that it's not so "sucky" at all.

After the photo exhibit, I headed over to Lauriol to meet Housecunt Nikki and friend. They were done eating, so I ordered to go. I ate in bed, and fell asleep watching bad infomercials. (sigh)

Damn, that was a mouthful...(No Karrine Steffans)


Michelle Obama who? Chile, Michelle doesn't ever want a single day of Mehriban Aliyeva. Aliyeva is the wife of current president of Azerbaijan Ilham Aliyev, UNESCO Goodwill Ambassador. This is what I call a REAL first lady. I want my first lady in labels that are unattainable to most. That's the whole point...Duh?

"What is this place that you speak of? J. Crew? I'm not sure what that is..."

She votes in Chanel.

Escada, Akris, Dolce Oh my!

Wow, and she gives face for days!

You can step your game up now Michelle. Thanks...


Blondie and her friend forest fire crotch were on the train the other day. I was trying to nap, but these whores wouldn't let me. They were babbling something about being "so wasted" the night before?
I'm sure they went to some bad bar in Georgetown, got sloshed, and made out with each other while random guys watched. Just a normal night. I didn't care about their adventures in Drunkville, I was trying to sleep dammit! Whores!


We all know that Erykah Badu never falls short This chick always comes with the hotness. This is her new video for "Window Seat" from her new album ' New Amerykah Part Two: Return of the Ankh' (out tomorrow). The song is amazing, and so is the video. No matter how crazy you think this woman is, she always makes you think.
Don't knock her for being an individual. She's an iconoclast, we need more like her.


Happy Monday fuckers!

1 comment:

Dovie-Lee Lineau said...