Thursday, April 08, 2010

Cheaters, "Spectacular", Caught by Q, and "Housecunt" Thursdays...

Ummm, so lately I've been totally infatuated with the show 'Cheaters'. I've seen the show of course, but now It's "DVR worthy" for me now. I know the show is tacky, tasteless, and crass, but those are all things that I am, so watch the fuckin' clip. This is right after a cheating man was revealed to his girlfriend. If you can get past the fact that they sound like slaves (heavy southern accent), this is pretty damn entertaining. Get into when the girlfriend calls the mistress a "muscle dike". Anyone who says the words "muscle dike" is a friend of mine. Enjoy this, cause I damn sure did.


It seems like Lil Miss Kiely Williams is all grown up. A far cry from her days as a Cheetah Girl, Williams sings about some pretty racy things in her new single "Spectacular". Both the video and the song have created a lot of controversy. I have no clue why? It's 2010 for crying out loud. People were saying that it paints a bad picture for teenage girls, and that it promotes promiscuity. Trust me, those little fast ass teenage girls were fucking waaayyy before this video.
In my opinion, the song is a little cheesy (so is the video), but kudos to her for stepping out of her Disney image. She better like it on this side, because she'll NEVER work for Disney again! Especially not after all of the butt sex talk in the song. (laughs) I said butt sex...


Speaking of butt sex...

I was shopping in Georgetown yesterday, and saw this. Do they know this is wrong? It surely caught the eyes of people walking on the street.

(singing: Ding dong, the witch is dead!) Yeeeesssss!!!!! I also saw this yesterday while shopping. Ed Hardy in Georgetown is closed! I wondered who the fuck still bought that garish shit? I guess my picketing in front of the store, and letters to my Congressman worked? Ed Hardy? Get the fuck outta here!

(jots down notes to get website shut down)


As the newest addition to the RHC of DC cast, I of course was made to go last, (Well, there's Jonathan, but all he's gonna talk about is spray tans). Either that, or they're hatin' on me cuz of my swimmer's hair? Which leads me to who l am. My name is Tamara AKA Ghetto Barbie AKA Swimmer's Hair. Like I said, I'm new to the group so for awhile I'm gonna watch what I say because I'm on probation, well that and because I work for an uber-conservative firm that probably monitors everything I touch/buy/speak/ get the point. My life is nowhere near as fab as the rest of the "Housecunts". They admitted me based on pity (and my Swimmer's Hair), but as the Michelle of this Destiny's Child, I'mma still do what I need to do to keep ya'll entertained.

Let me also mention that I have quite a few degrees so some of the words I use you may not be
familiar with, as they are not lyrics contained in any of the songs on 106 and Park's Top Ten.
Feel free to keep your dictionary handy. Moving of my favorite expressions is "life
changing" quite often we encounter things that we think to ourselves: Where was my life before this? Or on the flip side of life could do without this. Do I need to give you some examples so we are on the same page? Ready?

Where was my life before this?

And my life could do without this...

Ya'll with me? So I'm gonna focus on things through my week that changed my life. (*Disclaimer: I already said my life is boring so just cuz my findings don't change your life have nothing to do with me...sit down, shut up, and keep reading...oh yeah and pray my life gets more exciting so you can have better ish to read from me in the future.) Okay so where was I? Oh yeah, this week's life dear aunt passed away a week ago. My mom, dad, twin sisters and I all went to Philadelphia to be with the rest of my family. The twins and I snuck away with Daddy to Cheesecake Factory to get in some quick shots before dealing with my mom's family. For the record, the people in the picture below are people I cannot live without,
and those shots of Patron on deck?

I cannot imagine what my life was like before them.
After my aunt's funeral we celebrated her life at the church (where alcohol was not allowed - except the unfermented case they had on deck for Easter Sunday.) After repast at the church, close family went back to my uncle's house and...well...let me let the pictures tell the story...first, EVERY SINGLE function held by my mom's side of the family includes some sort of alcohol - be it wine, Colt 45, or Hen-Dog. You are not considered part of the family unless you drink, hence we start them young!

And since we all drink (heavily in most cases), my uncle came up with the bright idea of putting a bathroom in the living room coat closet. It seemed nice enough from the outside:

But on the inside - actually naw...I can't even show ya'll a picture of the inside. I mean seriously??? I could have lived without this. Now please, know that I'm not trying to put my family out there. They made me into the multi-faceted person I am today, and taught me everything I know. For instance, my Uncle Wayne (leaning up against the truck) he told me if a man EVER put his hands on me exactly what to do with a knife to make him regret that decision. Now that is advice a girl can't live without.

Before I go, I'd love to leave you guys with a picture of the Black Blues Brothers...and yeah they are related.

Gosh I love my family. Take some time out of your busy schedules to spend some time with your family and let them know just how much they mean to you - you never know when they will be taken away from you. (RIP Aunt Yvette)

Thanks for reading, and see you guys next time. Swimmer's Hair signing out! (wink)


PynkSpirit said...

that is the funniest shyt I have read since reading Erika's spill ... Y'all are too dayum funny ... Loves it!!!

Skrawberry Gunk said...

I get life!

Q said...

Thanks guys!  Keep reading!