Monday, October 26, 2009

Weekend Wrap-Up--The Louboutin Edition, The Monique Show, and...

Ummm? I really don't know where to start? Actually, I'll start here. This will be the last weekend that I'm calling Monday's post 'The Weekend Wrap-Up', because... never mind, I won't read, I'll behave for once.
So Friday work was all hype in preparation for the Christian Louboutin personal appearance. There wasn't much else going on, everyone was waiting to come in on Saturday to see the King (queen). After work I headed up to Mazza to meet Normie for a little shopping excursion. I thought about going out, but I couldn't see it. I needed to get rest for the event the next day.
On Saturday I rose early and accessorized properly for the long day ahead. When I arrived at work, everything was in place. Louboutin's staff held a private morning meeting for us employees. We discussed product knowledge and Louboutin's inspirations for the current collection. Any man that designs shoes so sexy and delicious is a queen after my own heart--I was in heaven. I had no clue what I was in store for later in the day...

This was the scene in the store at 10:15. We open at 10. There were cunts waiting at the door when we opened, all in Louboutins of course. It was literally the "red sea". Christian (I can call him that now), was slated to start the P.A. at 1, but he arrived early to speak to press.


Everyone was excited to see the man who designs the ultimate "fuck me shoe". The stores energy was like no other. Some people stood in line for 4 hours in Louboutins to see Louboutin!

He personalized shoes, and sat down with each and every woman who came. He was so nice, that he even stayed 2 hours past the event time to accommodate late comers.

While the craziness was happening upstairs, I was having lunch downstairs...


There she is, (in Lil Wayne voice) Ms. Nikki Baaaabby! She was lucky enough to get one of the limited edition Louboutin champagne sets that there are only 150 of in the U.S.

After my lunch with Nikki and Tamara, my bestie Normie came to visit. The event was over, and most of the customers had left the store. I had to run up to the executive offices to get a shoe that Louboutin signed after the event. I was called into the office by Christian's assistant Michael (he got in), and there he was the man himself. He looked exhausted, but was still personable. We all chatted like teenage girls. Michael asked for my number, and wanted to know some spots to hang out. He said that he would text me later, and he did...

Next thing you know, I was having THE absolute gayest night of my life. Christian is soooo over, he wanted to see "go-go boys", so SECRETS it was. There's a drag performance downstairs, and all nude go-go boys upstairs. Mind you guys that we have a gaggle of straight men with us as well. It wade for a very interesting evening. One of the dancers in particular was very talented. He put one leg on the wall, and shook his ass for filth. I've been practicing, look out J!
After the club, Louboutin and his assistants hit it back to the Hay Adams where they were staying. I sent a text yesterday saying thank you, and that we enjoyed ourselves. The response back was that Louboutin had a great time, and thought we were "fabulous". Take that!

4:15 a.m. we were all hungry as hell. Steak and Eggs it was! We went to a seedy greasy spoon in couture and ate for filth! This is my sister Natalie in Louis Vuitton runway...

Who the fuck else can smile with their eyes like that? She's such a queen! She was telling Louboutin that she wanted to be a drag performer. He told her to "blot out her eyebrows, and draw them in hight"! He got life from her, as everyone always does!
What a weekend! Don't be mad that you didn't hang out with Christian Louboutin in a shady gay strip club! And the hater award goes too...

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Monday October 26, 2009

Dear Monique,

I was just writing this letter to tell you that I absolutely loath you and your show. Even though I had doubts, I wanted to give you a chance so I watched your first episode. Your fat ass screamed for the whole hour. I've never seen such Tom Foolery! You personally set the "black movement" back at least 100 years. I am ashamed and deeply saddened that you haven't already been cancelled. I know that you are on BET, and all they play is repeats of 'Baby Boy', but I'd gladly watch 'Baby Boy' over and over again to avoid your ridiculous show.

I'm actually in the process of forming a petition to get your show off air. If that doesn't work, I will go to Congress. I will not rest until your black chubby face is off my television.

P.S. I loved you in 'Queens of Comedy'.

Regards,

Quincy Jones

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I was minding my own business (as I always do) the other day, and saw this! An 8 ball jacket? Did he have to take a time machine back to 92? I used to have one, I was the baddest bitch in my school. Everyone was all over my man ovaries because I was the first to have it! After all the bammas in school started to slowly get them, I found the nearest bonfire and threw mine into it! Hmmm, bonfire. I wan't some marshmallows....


Happy Monday!

7 comments:

della! said...

GAL HER SHOW IS A DAMN MESS! IM NOT EVEN ABOUT TO BELIEVE THIS!

Reggie said...

I agree with my brother! She screaming that whole damn time!!!!!! I was like...."WHERE IS WENDY?"! I love Ms. Williams!!!!!

JJ said...

Q, you are so mother effin fabulous I can't stand it!

Michael said...

I am not at all surprised that Mr. Louboutin got life from you and your friends! And Both Wendy and Monique have set the black race back with their tired shows! I have a petition circulating to get BET taken off the air! I hope you will sign it!

chic noir said...

you are too major and I'm beyond jealous now.

sapphire blu said...

wow!! you got to hang with queen CL. nice job q!!! argh to mr. wendy williams and ghetto ass mo'nique. i never wish bad on anyone, but i cannot wait until both shows are removed ;o(

Deonte` K said...

LMAO boy you are a fool lol loll.